Three Coping Skills for Depression

Depression is the most common mental health disorder in the world. With the COVID pandemic, rates of depression have only gotten worse as we have been forced into isolation and naturally worry more about the state of the world. Not knowing who will get COVID or how it will affect our future can cause increased levels of anxiety. Now more than ever we need to recognize not only the need to protect ourselves from the virus, but how to protect our mental health during such times. 

One of the difficult things about depression is the fact that the very things that will help us to get out of it are the things that are hard to do. Many coping skills require you to consciously go against what you feel like doing. This sort of feels like dragging your depressed brain behind you until it catches up. I will explain more about this in a bit.

Here are three research-based coping skills for depression which also help to prevent it from occurring in the first place:

1. Behavioral activation
2. Social Support
3. Cognitive training

Behavioral Activation

Depression literally “depresses” your energy and motivation. You don’t feel like doing anything so many end up staying in bed for hours or not going to work. You let the house get dirty and responsibilities are forgotten. Allowing this to happen only causes the depression to get deeper and deeper as we give it more power and get used to avoidance.

One way to counteract depression is to activate the body and brain through action. You cannot simply wait for the motivation to get on with your life. Instigating action triggers a change in your brain that then delivers the corresponding emotional benefits. Emotion theory knows that actions often precede emotion. When you smile, you feel positive emotions, not the other way around. The hardest part of this is taking the first step. This is why it is better to recognize sooner than later when you are feeling depressed and to take action.

Some ways to do this are to simply act as if you were not feeling depressed. This is not the same as ignoring your depression. This is telling your brain that you are in control of how you feel. This can be different depending on the person and the severity of the depression. For those that are severely depressed, start with cleaning yourself and getting dressed. Get out of bed on time and clean your space. Putting your house in order has a way of ordering your thoughts as well. Another great way to activate is to exercise. Exercise is just as powerful and an antidepressant. It releases endorphins and reactivates your body and mind. You can also practice hobbies that you enjoy such as music, gardening, games, or cooking. 

You just need to do something. It helps to get started if you think about and tell yourself that if you do this you will feel better. You have to have hope and faith in the method so that you will take the first step because you want to feel better. It is certainly a struggle but once you make it a habit, this is the quickest way to crawl out of a depressive slump.

Social Support

Seeking and maintaining social relations is another great coping skill for depression. This is especially true for those who are normally social individuals when they aren’t feeling depressed. Again, when you are in a depressive episode, this is the opposite of what you want to do. You want to hide and not come out of your room. When someone texts you to go out, you want to say no. Just recognize that this is your depression talking. Just like with behavioral activation, you need to do the opposite of what you feel like doing when you’re depressed. Take control and let your brain catch up.

Before depression hits, try to remain in daily contact with friends or family. You can be a part of support groups as well for people with depression. Humans are social animals. This is why the pandemic has been hard on so many. We have evolved to lean on each other in order to progress and be stronger. Maintain social relationships so that when the depression hits, you have someone there. When you are depressed and you have the opportunity for a social outing, do it even though you don’t feel like it. Have faith that it will be good for you. Even being around strangers feels better than being alone. So maybe you could go shopping or be out in public. Just be with other people because when you are in the depths of depression, there is nothing worse than being alone with your own thoughts.

Cognitive Training

One of the more popular therapies for depression is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT. CBT involves recognizing the relationship between events that occur and our reactions to such events. It hypothesizes that no external event “causes” us to be depressed. Something happens in between. We interpret that event based on our core beliefs or automatic response and that determines our emotions and behaviors.

Here is a visual:

Something you can start to do on your own or with the help of a therapist is to begin to discover your own dysfunctional thought processes. Notice when you feel depressed and what the triggers are. Then step back and think of how you interpret those events and how those may influence your emotions and behaviors. Then think of different ways to interpret those situations that will produce more positive emotions and behaviors. This is sort of like talk-therapy with yourself. You can train your brain and create new neural pathways which will allow you to respond better in distressing situations if you are consistent in your efforts.

Another way you can rewire your brain is through gratitude. Individuals who feel depressed focus heavily on the negative aspects of the day. Practice noticing the good things that happened at the end of the day and think of why they happened and how to experience more. You could also start the day with a list of things you are grateful for.

Don’t Give Up!

It takes time to learn new mental habits. Many have just seen things negatively for so long. If you really want to make a change in your thoughts, it requires consistent effort. However, don’t give up if you don’t change your entire thought process in one day. Be patient with yourself and keep moving forward.

A common theme with these three coping skills is the focus on acting out something different than what the depression wants you to do. The key is accepting that you do have a great deal of control over your emotions and working until you have the emotions that you desire. It takes discipline and willpower to fight back depression. But the more you do it, the less power it will have over you. Remember that you are not a “depressed individual”. Depression doesn’t define you. It is something that happens to you. Be careful that you don’t identify with those feelings and remember that you have the ability to feel differently. I hope that all may find something useful here and take greater control over their depression as it arises.